After talking for the month, Jon and I both were excited to “meet” each other again. We had written almost every day and chatted several times a week. There was a point where he thought he might get to come home from San Diego a couple of days early. That fell through. But he had let me know that he told his counselor their was a girl he needed to get back to. Garsh. How romantical.
About a week before his arrival, I began to do my usual. I starved, dieted, worried, fretted. I examined my stretch marks. What in the world would this guy think of me? Did he only slightly remember another tall blond? Would he freak out when he saw me? He was soooooo cute….what if I wasn’t up to his standards?
The roller coaster in my mind was ridiculous and exhausting.
When he did finally come back, I don’t think we ran into eachothers arms the first day he was home. My faulty memory tells me it was a day or two after.
He asked if I would come over to his house. Maybe so his room mates could run me off if he thought I was a dog. The drive over was sheer hell. I was sweating bullets. I wore a blue sweater and jeans, my hair was down, I have no idea what I wore for footwear. I just prayed I wouldn’t fall down, or pee my pants. I wanted everything to be perfect.
I walked up to the door and a guy who was not Jon answered. I think it was his roommate Lee. Though, it could have been Andrew. He had a poop eating grin on his face. I suddenly became alarmed. Had they watched me walking up and decided I was a dog????? I timidly asked if I had the right place. He smiled and ushered me in. I turned a corner, and there. he. was. I don’t have a clue what he was wearing. I think some sort of t shirt and maybe some shorts. I just saw that Navy haircut and those eyes and those muscles, and I just stared like a lost little school girl. We said some hello’s. I have such sparse memories. There must have been words exchanged. I just went blank. I am blank on a lot of it. He and his roommates all disappeared for about ten minutes in the back of the house.
Maybe their plan was to hide until I left. Jon resurfaced, and the roommates stayed scarce.
I DO remember that he went to use the bathroom at some point. At that very instant, I realized I had to go, REALLY bad. So I waited outside the bathroom door. I heard him peeing and singing to himself “Come and get your love…” Oh no! I panicked! I had made the decision that I was not going to sleep with anyone (else) until I got married. I had been down that road. It had backfired majorly for me. Oh no, oh no, what if he wanted that right away? What did it mean? Why was he singing that song??? I thought about running out the front door. Instead I went back to the living room and sat down. After he came out, I ran to the bathroom, about to burst. I looked around and was grossed out. Four guys can make a huge, hairy mess!
The visit was kind of blah. Not anything I expected. He sent me off with a goodbye and a wave from the front door. As I drove away, I thought, wow, I blew it. Something went wrong somewhere. I didn’t hear from him for a few days. I tried to wait for him to call me.
I totally caved and called him first. (Or I may have emailed him.)
Turns out, we were both thinking the same thing about each other. We had blown it. He waited to see if I was even interested. When he found out I was, we were like peas and carrots.
Next up, meeting the family, the KID, and getting married.